For a friend, (Mun-Mun, Ruth, and Glaiza)

Friendship- a relationship between two people who share the same thought and same passion… there are those old friend, new friend, ordinary friend, boyfriend, girlfriend (ay iba na ata yun…) and bestfriend. But, when mo nga ba matatawag na friend ang isang tao? Is it when you know how to help him/her if she/he needs you? When you laugh together? When you cry together? Or when you shop together? Is there really a measurement for friendship? In some person maybe yes, there is… but in others wala…I have a lot of friends, some of them kilala ko lang sa face, maybe dahil madami na sila that why I forgot their name na… or di kaya may memory gap na ako? Me myself di minemeasure ang friendship but namimili ako ng friends, why? I cant explain it well, I’ll try this way… I can be your friend but once na may ginawa kang wrong which can affect me and yourself im sorry but I will forget that friendship, coz its not worth it na eh im not saying this for you to like me, its just that I know myself well when it comes to friendship… I can talk to you about anything you want; I also want you to be that open.I love making friends, coz somehow they can teach me things that I don’t know yet. Some of my friends describe me as fun to be with, jolly and can easily adopt in new things, talkative (which is true) and Loud, I can make you laugh the whole day (daw), sensitive and KRUNKRUNG (as always!)Sometimes I talk too much o nonsense things, but you know what? I wonder, knowing those misunderstood actions they still like me, why those projections cant deny the real me, the real feelings inside of me, why is it every time I’m pretending I’m happy (though I’m not) they still know it, with just one stare into my eyes they know what’s inside of me, are they a real friend? Can I call them a real friend?Sometimes inspite of our misunderstood talks, the away-bati days, we found ourselves missing each other company, hugging and kissing each other, and talking to each other again, seems like nothing happen! Ganun naman talaga dapat eh, we should understand and treasure each other, and cherish the memories we did.No am is an island and we can’t live alone… we need to be friendly and we should know them well, let go of a friend who can ruin your life and treasure a friends who’s worth keeping, a friend who laugh when you cry and cry when you laugh, a friend who will fight with you, when you’ve done something wrong, and hug you when you did great, who will be proud of you when you achieve what you want and a friend who will try to catch you when you fall… a friend who is worth it for friendship, A friend who will help you grow… 

 

(Me, RutH, MuN, en gLaiZa..hahaha they are my friends..anD this is my gRoUp!)

                  (taken during our juniors night!)                        (Nurses on the go!)

                       (wEeH? picture picture tym!)      (oooHHHHH!!!!???? hmmmft!)

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i love my family so much!

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tHe pHaNtOm oF rEaLiTy!!!?

Minsan ang dami dami nating tanong na di mahanapan ng sagot. Minsan kung kani kanino natin hinahanap yung sagot at di natin alam na tayo lang din naman yung makakasagot nun, tapos sa kakahanap natin ng sagot may makikilala tayo… tapos aakalain natin na DESTINY mo na natin siya, nun pala siya pa yung ,magdadagdag ng pain na ating dinadala…

What if once in your life may nagparamdam sayo ng kakaibang feeling? Yung tipong you’re on a cloud9 and nobody can reach you…(so high!) then in that short time he will left you a stain… stain na di na pwedeng mawala, stain na sobrang masasaktan ka… what will you do para maka move on? Find new one? Refresh? Or pretend na ok ka lang kahit hinde na? Sometimes in my life nangyare na yun, sobrang saket, almost a year kong dinala yung pain,I don’t know why ang tagal mawala na try ko na yata lahat ng defense mechanism sabi nga sa psyche’ yung mga projection, reaction formation, denial, sublimation, conversion… just to ignore the pain but still di ito nabawasan…Minsan I act like a stupid na, fooling myself na baka may pag-asa pa… I make myself believe na, it wont heal until I fall in love again, pero mas mahirap pala yun, knowing na minamhal ka ng isang tao tapos ikaw naman nag chicheat lang, he will say “i Love You” tapos you will answer him “I LOVE YOU TOO” tapos behind that is your heart saying “BUT I LOVE HIM MORE”…Meron din akong ginawa na maybe help me to move on, yung ituon ko ang attention ko sa iba, I made myself busy,and make friends to strangers, pati nga jeepney driver kinakausap ko make friends ba? siguro for them nakakatuwa kase my taong nagtitiyagang kausapin sila about thier lives… hehehe at alam nyo ba na sa sorbrang nacurious ako sa mga parker ba yun o barker eh i tried it too.. nakakatuwa, nakakaaliw syempre di na ako nagpabayad sa mama’ tulong ko na yun sa kanya.. (how nice naman is me…) I also tried to do night life because I hardly fall to sleep… the result? Well good naman…At last if found the answers to my questions na…and these are the things I did..

I face the problem…

I manage it…

I solve it…

I face the reality and its phantom… that we are not meant to be!

I’ve learn to forgive but never forget… why? Because I’ve learned something on him that can make or help me grow…

And lastly I’ve learned to call on him (GOD), talk to him and thank him… I know he believes in me kaya nga binigyan niya ako ng ganitong problem eh, kase alam niya na kaya ko…

Pinahirapan ko pa sarili ko… eh, kaya ko naman pala, yun nga lang it takes time.. maybe because break up is not an over night thing…But now I moved on… He’s out of my system!

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for you!

Now you’re gone and I am forced to move on.
I never wanted to say goodbye to you, it was hard.
will you think of me still after you begin to have fun?
will you fall in love and forget all about me and what was?
We spent a lot of time arguing and being apart.
knowing very well we didn’t have time to disregard.
when will you return and if you do will it be to me?
is this really the end or a new beginning, we will see…..

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iS tHere rEaLLy An “Art” in Letting Go?

It’s over. He’s gone.

Why do we have to part while
the love is still there?
Why do we have to suffer?
Why do we have to cry when
someone buds goodbye?
Why do beginnings have an end?
Why do we have to meet
only to lose in the end?

There are questions left unanswered,
words left unsaid, letters left unread,
poems left undone, songs left unsung,
loved left unexpressed,
promises left unfulfilled.

In a relationship,
one of the hardest things to do
is saying goodbye and letting go.
It is as hard as breaking a crystal
because you’ll never know when you
will be able to pick up the pieces again.
More often than not, they who go
feel not the pain of parting:
it is they who stay behind that suffer,
because they are left
with memories of love
that was meant to be,
a love that was.

At the beginning and at the end
of a relationship,
we are embarrassed to find ourselves alone.
Unfair as it may seem,
but that’s the way love goes.
That’s the drama, the bittersweet
and the risk of falling in love.
After all, noting is constant but change.
Everything will eventually come to it’s end
without us knowing when,
without us knowing how,
without us knowing why.
And we must forget not because we have to
but because we have to.

In letting go, sorrows come
not a single spy but in battalion.
It seems that everywhere you go,
everything you do,
every song you hear,
every turn of your head,
every move of your body,
every beat of you heart,
every blink of your eye and every breath
you take always reminds you of him.

It’s like a stab of a knife,
a torture in the night.
Funny how the whole world
becomes depopulated
when only one person is missing.
Just imagine,
there are a billion people on earth
and yet it seems you feel lonely
and empty without the other.

I don’t know if it’s worth calling an art,
but letting go entails
special skills sparkled
with a considerable space and time.
Time heals all wounds but it takes
a little push on out part.
Acceptance plays a part.
Not all love stories end with
“…and they lived happily ever after.”

Sometimes we have to part because of
circumstances beyond our control.
We have to suffer if it would
mean happiness for others.
We have to cry to
temporarily let go of the pains.
Every beginning has its end
like every dawn has its dusk.
It’s something we can’t control,
something we had to live up.

It’s over. He’s gone.

But life has to go on.
Goodbye doesn’t always mean forever.
There will be a place and time
where questions will be answered,
words will be spoken.
Letters will be read,
poems will be recited in the night,
songs will be sung in harmony,
love will be expressed in solitude and
promises will be fulfilled.
Somewhere. Somehow. Someday.

* This poem was written by someone else and not by me. I just though it’s a great poem that everyone with a broken heart can relate too. *      

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